I've been kind of busy round here and not had a lot of time to devote to my beloved blog. With a full load of classes an overtime internship and a long distance relationship, I've been spread a bit thin. If you are a friend of mine and have not heard from me in a while I'm quite sorry but I really would love to hang out soon.

I've got an interview to conduct and an midterm to write this weekend, oh and I have to film a sunset which will take up about 2 hours and a birthday party in which I have to make an appearance at. But after that give me a call and we can talk :)

I hope to see you soon ya'll soon and I think that a pool party is in order soon.

PS check out some of my work at http://cwbayarea.com/entertainment/music

sounds good to me

Bronson's

The main character is Bronson. Bronson was born in a small town. When he was a boy he often retreated into his own imagination. Growing up he was drawn to acting and performance arts. His passion to act and to deeply express himself through performance grew into a fulltime obsession. By the time he was 20 he was regularly starring in performances in his hometown at night and working as a commercial plumber by day.
He was always drawn to the stage. Any means possible was his mantra through the roughest of times. His father was a sporting man and would always bet against him in his success of his performances. His father took too the bottle soon after Bronson took to the stage. A man who was the 1st white male to be the 1st round draft pick in the Mexican futbol league, and the author of the best-selling book “I’ve been to hell, and her name was China” a biography of his life experiences during the trip he took with team Mexico in the Winter Olympics; his experience turned sour soon after team Mexico’s main downfall, their arrogance, put them in the situation that made them realize they showed up to the Olympics thinking there was a mistake in them not being invited, and a man which the word disappointment couldn’t begin to explain his disgust of his sons choice in profession. Needless to say when Bronson realized that his father was driving a brand new Mercedes off the money he had won off of Bronson’s last mishap in the 2nd act of “Antigone” playing King Creon where he forgot a trivial line, he was crushed.
Bronson’s mother a self-medicating alcoholic and self-proclaimed tourettes syndrome sufferer with the potent disease of mouth flatulence love’s Bronson more than anyone in his world. She mentioned in her last attempted suicide note, which are written daily just “for kicks”, that Bronson was the only one keeping her going. He loves her dearly yet is constantly alerted of her disease both by her flammable breath and her uninhibited shouts of “FAILURE”.
Through it all his oddly supportive family is his even keeled partner in life, his best friend, confident and life coach . Jackleene is a former track star who only quite recently has been secretly harboring deep rooted feelings for Bronson. Bronson has told Jackleene everything in his mind for the past 19 years including his first secret “gaaallggaa” and his most recent “I put it in her drainpipe”; the plumbing accident included a mutual teacher Jackleene and Bronson once had and despised. He had taken military grade artificial cement and clogged Ms. Kakeass’s drainpipe willing a disastrous and smelly backup. Even though Bronson would have to eventually clean it up, this small victory over the monster that was Ms. Kakeass and the tortures he had to endure in her 1st grade class was well worth it! Jackleene and Bronson made a dynamic duo. Her silly faces and positive outlook on life kept him in rapture, and his steady hand while working with pipes kept her in a state of fascination.

FB BS awesomeness!

Three startegies for self deception are: selective-omission, exaggeration and embellishment, and blaming circumstances. Selective omission can be seen when people on Facebook are tagged in photos. If someone deems a photograph to be unbecoming of their public image they can selectively omit themselves from the photo by de-tagging himself. Exaggeration and embellishment can be seen in Facebook when someone makes himself or herself seem a lot more important. For instance a person may talk about a particular event through photo comments as having much more grandiose details than were actually present. Blaming circumstances is a case in which someone may blame an unassociated circumstance as an explanation of a particular behavior. In the case of someone on Facebook, there might be a posted photograph where a person is partaking in an unsavory social situation or ritual. If the person cannot take the photo off of the Internet they might write a comment blaming something as a possible excuse of their behavior in hopes that someone viewing the image will accept their behavior as merely an outlier in their otherwise pristine veneer.

Day 1...Too soon?

How can one be
How can one be so drawn to that one?
Is it looks, why not looks, I love looks.
But its her ways, her stare and gaze.
I love those days when we begged to stay; 50 miles away?
Too far? Touché.

I got a plane ticket air bound to her to kick it.
You can have my ticket, I'd rather get communication teach me teleportation.
Just a few more days I get her stare her gaze and show her my love of her ways.

Chicken Wing

My theory is that this came from a baby angel, cupid perhaps, that committed a mortal sin; because angels lose their wings after they commit a mortal sin right?
To go deeper, this was laying pretty much directly outside my bathroom window (only thing is my window is two stories up, but hey this little fucker could fly so NO its not that unlikely). Cupid must have been on his lunch break, probably got a burrito at Papalote, then was on his way back downtown when he saw me showering. He thought to himself, "hey this dude is pretty bangin', let me pause out for a tid and try and get a sneaky peak. Now I'm not very religious but that should not have been a mortal sin...unless he wanted to kill me...but I digress.

Basically what I'm trying to get at is that I inadvertently killled cupid, I'm just happy that I was struck pretty hard before I did.

I give up

I think that I have lost my touch. I was walking home from school the other day and saw this in a bus stop advertisement window. The ad is for H&M, a clothing company offering "high style" clothing at affordable prices. They do not however include the inflated price you will have to pay out of your dignity fund, which will be depleted after your purchase.

Please oh Please

In my most shameless attempt at trying to get a job, I have started a petition to try and get my foot in the door at The Onion.

The Onion is a hilarious media organization. They started in the print world and have since then created hilarious news stories in both visual and audio media realms. I have wanted to write for them ever since I started writing comedy at the IOwest theater.
Being that comedy writing is a very competitive field I felt that I needed some way to set myself apart from everyone else. So I created a petition. I have been sending the petition out to family and friends. I even reached out to a couple online community forums that I belong to for their support. So far I have gotten up to 54 signatures inside of 5 days.
I am hoping that with time comes a larger number of supporters and gains the attention of The Onion. I have sent a follow up letter to my initial contact at the publication and am awaiting [any] response with nervous shaking knuckles.

I am both nervous yet confident at my chances and will keep all of you in the know about any progress.

Amazing Acoustic

Amazing

I was lucky enough to have a father music savvy enough to introduce me to Leo Kottke at a very early age. Leo has overcome some intense obstacles in his career and continues to be my favorite guitarist. I mean the guy is partially deaf and had massive tendon damage in one of his hands. If that isn't certifiably badass in your book then, shame on you.

Atmosphere Concert, The Warfield April 20th 2009

It was a classic and one for the ages.
10:30pm when Slug and Ant took the stage The Warfield in San Francisco erupted with a cacophonous ruckus that shook the hearts and eustachians of every one in the building.

The 420 aroma perfumed the atmosphere inside the venue and with his live performers following along side him, Slug ripped the face off the microphone and began a journey that brought the crowd down a path of the bands greatest hits.

If you were in attendance you know how epic this concert was. If you weren't I implore you to somehow find a bootleg copy of the performance. Maybe then you can see how brilliant the night was.

It was also a nice touch when Slug brought Aesop Rock to the stage for a freestyle duo that deafened Zeus himself.

Thanks Atmosphere. Happy Birthday Momma.

Old Woman

Today I was grabbing a bite to eat in Noe Valley. As I exited the less than classy Chinese restaurant I came upon the nicest beggar woman I have ever met. I say beggar because who knows whether or not she was homeless, not too many homeless people I have come across listen to ipods. But as I walked by her I was cordial and bestowed a kind smile upon her. She smiled back and then hit me with "spare some change honey?"
I thought this to be ever so interesting. I almost said "no but spare some music tips as to whats good?"
All that came out of my mouth however was "I'm sorry I don't, but have a wonderful day!"
to which she retorted "You too baby".

Apparently my prime demographic are black women aged 45-52 who sit on the sidewalk listening to their ipods and begging for change. In hindsight I should have dropped her .99 cents and told her a good song to download.

I begged for change once, then I voted.

Jackpot

Hell with Waldo where are redhead ladies that look like this?

First Cut

Here is the first cut of the second sketch shot for "FOOLE" aka the show I'm putting together for USFtv aka the TV station for my school.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oF8PJ6-vFjA

Getting her painted brazed and fixed up. ooooo weeee.

Have you flown in a vintage WWII bomber lately?

I highly recommend it. Word of advice, bring a camera and someone who doesn't mind you babbling about the amazingness of your experience like an 8 year old.

I'm ready for a trip up the coast. I live in such proximity of some of the most artfully crafted landscapes in the entire world, I owe it to myself to get my booty up there and check it all out!

"Entire world? Really?"

Yeah you Slugworth!! The US Northwest is where its at, and by "it" I mean the greatest attributes a place of residence could offer.

The peninsula to pikes peak is covered in splendor, the kind of splendor that ensnare tourists, inspire artists and reel in the realestate bucks.

Food Poisoning

It's honestly the most interesting thing I have ever encountered. In the span of what felt like two days I have become a new person. In a sense I shed off my old self and became what will forever be the best me I can be.

Wikipedia explains that the duodenum as an organ that "regulates the rate of emptying of the stomach via hormonal pathways." Believe you me, mine is in perfect working order. Mission accomplished duodenum!!

Apparently this guy thinks Isaac Asimov had a lost Fourth principle of robotics...All service bots must be Mexican.

Bon Iver

Bon Iver's "Blood Bank" EP is pretty darn fantastic. Bits of Feist and Imogen Heap creep in but overall he maintains his own personal nuance of sound that sets him in a world of his own that he creates beautifully for you the listener.

LIGHTNING

It's 11:33pm and I'm sitting in my living room. I just rearranged my furniture so its even more comfortable than ever before. I love it. I have a cup of tea in one hand and my computer in my lap. I'm talking to great people on Gchat and watching life enriching videos online (how they created the digital process for "Benjamin Button" and College humor pranks, stuff Nietzsche would be doing). I start admiring cool apartments on apartmenttherapy.com (interior design, Jared's inner most favorite past time #373) and it hits. It hits like the not guilty verdict in the OJ trial.

LIGHTNING!!!

Oh man! I have been waiting for lightning since, well honestly since last year. But this is better. I don't know why, but its the sort of thing that just makes you think about sitting inside an old rickety log cabin by the ocean in a wet storm. Huddled near the pot belly stove, you listen to the symphony produced by the wind howling through the cracks in the wood facade in perfect harmony with the waves crashing as you wait for the kettle. The rain drops on the thatch roof switch personalities effortlessly between that of a Golden Retriever and a Pitbull. But throughout the downpour all your thinking of is that this rain must be bringing some amazing snow for the skiing later on.

OOOoooWEEeee

FML

Today I contacted the website www.fmylife.com to try and create a creative partnership where I would create short vignettes that correlated with the stories featured on their website. They turned me down and said that they were already...well you can read it.

Dear Jared,

You can have private fun with FML story. But remember they is a copyright on it and that we are already working with TV producers by legal contract.

Thank you neverless for this proposition and keep enjoy the site.

Regards,


Didier Guedj
FML staff

Now I'm not a grammartician but something is leading me to believe english, not his strong suit.

The Chinese win again

So here it is. The 6LB rat with the foot long tail that was created in China. Not only are they beating the US in terms of man power and smog production but now they are creating rats that dwarf ours? And whats more is that they are mocking us with this fact! Look at that smile!

Have you ever been so mad...

that you just wanted to beat up a sandcastle?

Shirt-tastic-voyage

I know kitschy slogans on shirts are so 2006, but live a little. These shirts are pretty awesome and reasonably priced.

http://printliberation.com/store.php

PS dont get this one because I don't want to be your twin.

Successfully combining cowboys and Indians with 52 card pickup

I grew up with Nerf. To be honest I grew up always wanting Nerf guns.
Sure sending the message that fun means getting together with your friends and shooting one another can be construed as a tad morbid, but who cares I'm a Darwinist. Mistakes don't happen to the chosen ones.

That being said it's time to get one of these bad boys into the hands of children everywhere. This Nerf gun touts itself as having the largest capacity of any Nerf gun ever created, guaranteeing seconds of fun and hours of picking up little f****** foam darts.

Google Reader

I'm a little late on the bandwagon, but lets be honest I'd rather be late than be on Rosie O'Donnell's family cruise.

Back to the matter at hand. Google reader. Read my links at the top of the page. I fully endorse all of them.

This is the weakest post I have ever posted...I'm sorry. Here's a fun website to make up for my indiscretion www.fmylife.com

AAAAAAAAAAnd this is why gingers get a bad rap.

Back to the Bay

Came home from LA and realized that place is a hole.
I don't mean to demean anyone living there because I have great people that I care very much about down there. But I finally realized what people mean when they use the term "That city will eat you alive". Nonsensical platitudes are the bane of my existence, but this one in particular really "grinds my gears".
But I understand it.
When you live somewhere you go into it with a specific mindset and points of reference. For instance if you come from the great plains where farms are in abundance and you move to LA you will think to yourself "wow this is weird there are no farms." when in reality it would be retarded for there to be farms in LA because the main driving force of the economy is not farming it is movie making.
After you live somewhere for a long enough time your frame of mind and points of reference for normalcy adapt to your surroundings (unless you are a hopeless homebody who can't survive anywhere but the confines of their hometown). This causes you to realize that the whole farms being in the middle of LA idea to be ridiculous and to accept that it is a movie town.
However this also has its side effects.
Since LA is a town of extraordinary personalities and circumstances peoples sense of normality is skewed. Now I am all for skewed perspectives, but even I have a definitive line of what normalcy is and what isn't. I know that buying a Lamborghini when I'm 24 on credit is probably a bad idea. I know that waiting tables in hopes of finally becoming "discovered" is not the greatest way of getting ahead in the acting world. And I'm pretty aware that fellating a boss to get a role in a major movie is going to hurt my mind and body. But people in LA do these things every day!!!
This sort of skewed sense of normalcy can eat someone alive, in other words it can ruin someones life leaving them alone poor or mentally unstable.

I'm so glad to be back in The City. I love you Golden Gate Park, I love you Pandhandle, I love you University, I love you cool breeze blowing through my bright sunny apartment, I love you fog horn that serenades me to sleep at night, I love you fog that glides silently and swiftly through the streets like a hot girl that you love catching a glimpse of, and I love you city scapes that encapsulate the essence and diversity of what it is to be the greatest city in the world.

I'm heading to LA Friday and I am as happy as a little girl sitting next to a Pinguino!

The bike needed some TLC adjustment in the shop but I finally get to pick her up tomorrow. So if you are in the San Francisco area and want hit up some bike ride action with your favorite Ginger hit me up.